Be generous about me when I'm gone

[selfinteresting]

[Hey, Eva. Going out to one of those fancy dinners for the Ushiromiya Group? Oh, that's cool. Don't let Kyrie sitting here on the chair at your vanity bother you. She'll be nice and quiet. And just watch.]

Comments

[golds]

[ Because you're the ones who caused all of that in the first place -- it's what she wants to say, but at the same time, she can't. Not out loud. Not even when she's alone, she just never can say it anymore, a truth locked away long ago. ]

I don't need to bother to explain myself to someone who's already dead, do I?

[selfinteresting]

It's awfully rude...when we did all the hard work for you to live in luxury like this... But, more importantly, are you certain it isn't you who is dead?

[golds]

I suppose it would be fitting if this delusion was my 'hell' if I were dead. [ in a way, she's not sure if she prefers it to this being real.. ]

But.. no, I'm sure I'm alive. And it's a good thing too, if not just to save Ange-chan from a monster like you.

[selfinteresting]

You would deny you've often felt you're already dead? Didn't you die that day with Hideyoshi? Or was it with George? Either way...Ange would be much better off with me, rather than the woman who stole her warm, loving family. Do you call this a family?

[golds]

Don't you mention them..! [ at that she's getting rather agitated - just hearing their names coming from her mouth of all people's, as if the memory isn't still painful enough. ]

Besides, I don't think I have to remind you of the things you said about that 'warm, loving family'!

[selfinteresting]

Aah, is that a problem? We were always the perfect family...

[golds]

As if you could be the perfect family when it's based on such a lie.

[selfinteresting]

Everyone was happy. Did you ever question us?

[golds]

No, because.. because nobody would suspect any mother to think like that, of course! [ which is exactly why it came as such a surprise to her during everything that happened.. ]

I couldn't even imagine thinking those sort of things about my George..!

[selfinteresting]

Tell me the reason you wanted a child. Especially a son. It was selfish, wasn't it? As I said before, a reason to keep your husband by your side...but for you, it's even more than that, isn't it? You wanted a son who could become the head. A son to show up Krauss-niisan and Natsuhi-neesan. A son to show father your superiority.

[golds]

[ .. of course she had to start about that, about her own selfish reasons she's come to regret even thinking up in the first place.. Eva can't help but swallow. ]

.. Yes. That's.. the original reason why I wanted to hurry up and get a child. [ She does admit it, her own selfish thoughts, her guilt, even if it's painful. ] But.. after that, it wasn't just about that anymore! George wasn't just meant to show my superiority, he's.. he's my son, I cared for him the way a mother should care for their child!

[selfinteresting]

Oh, I'm sure you did care for him exactly the way any mother cares for her child...

[aka the way she does :))]

[golds]

The way any real mother would. [ She knows what you're thinking, Kyrie!! god!! ]

[selfinteresting]

That's right. You see, you and I are just the same...

[golds]

[ nope, nope, nope, nope, the last thing she wants is to be compared to Kyrie - especially by Kyrie herself. ]

The two of us are nothing alike..! You hear me? Nothing!

[selfinteresting]

How many people did you shoot that day, Eva-neesan...? Natsuhi-neesan, Rudolf and myself? You killed far more than Rudolf, and yet, thought it acceptable to shoot him down? What of Battler, did you kill him too? Did you even bother to look to save him, or did you condemn him simply for being our child, as you have Ange?

[golds]

T-.. that first one was an accident! And if I hadn't shot either of you, who knows what you would've done! I thought maybe there was still someone left to save--! [ like Battler, right? but even so, it stings that Kyrie is accusing her of that too, as if she'd kill any of them, they were still kids, there was no reason.. ]

.. Even if I didn't see Battler-kun anywhere. So I just assumed you had already.. [ killed him, just like everyone else. ] So don't even try to compare a monster like you to me!

[selfinteresting]

Now why would I hurt my own child? That would be silly, wouldn't it...? I think you could have looked a bit harder, don't you?

[golds]

Battler-kun is Rudolf's child, right?! Besides, with the way you were talking about Ange-chan, I wouldn't be surprised at all if you had done something like that!

[selfinteresting]

Yes, he's Rudolf's child, it takes two, doesn't it? I told you already, children are bonds to keep a man by your side...though if you aren't already married, it might miss.

[golds]

You're.. you're disgusting! To even be capable to think of children as just that..!

[selfinteresting]

What other reason is there to have a child? Pregnancy and giving birth are both incredibly unpleasant, and your husband will be uninterested in you during that time. Once you have children...they take up your time, he may want you to give up working to look after them, they're annoying, dirty and expensive. Then, when they grow up, they disregard you completely and have no respect for what you sacrificed for their sake.

[golds]

[ yup, sure understands part of that at least-- any mother would in at least some way. ]

And you're saying you see nothing good at all then in having children?! Watching them grow up thanks to your good care and become happy, feeling their love.. those things don't mean anything to you..?!

[selfinteresting]

What good do those things do us?

[golds]

... Of course you wouldn't understand! [ kyrie's a monster, etc, etc, we all know it ]